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October 17, 2011  | by: Neha Govil

There’s been a lot of media frenzy over the past few weeks over whether or not Ashton Kutcher and Demi Moore are getting a divorce and what caused the separation. It came to light not too long ago that Ashton cheated on Demi on their six-year anniversary while partying in a hotel room, away from her.  Now, Ashton Kutcher’s alleged one night stand, Sara Leal, has sold her story to at least two different sources in shockingly candid tell-alls. Despite constantly fluctuating speculation on their marriage status, one thing has remained constant: Ashton is getting all of the blame for cheating! Does he deserve it?

At first glance, it makes sense to blame Ashton for partying separately from Demi and cheating on his wife on the eve of their six-year anniversary! However, it’s fair to question why Ashton was partying separately from Demi in the first place, and whether or not Demi had a hand in the failing marriage that caused Ashton to seek fulfillment elsewhere.

Ashton reportedly told lover Sara Leal that he was “separated” from his wife at the time of their tryst. This is the first sign indicating that things weren’t going very well in Ashton’s marriage to much-older Demi Moore. Other signs that Demi may have been responsible for the collapse of her marriage include her family and friends’ concern over her drinking habits, fueled by her fear that Ashton will leave her for someone younger, which was possibly caused by her drinking in a classic case of self-fulfilling prophecy. Her love of champagne has apparently been taking a toll on her marriage, her role as a parent, and her public image for years. Is Ashton’s cheating scandal a possible response to Demi Moore’s affair with the bottle?

Ashton Kutcher and Demi Moore

Furthermore, it’s not impossible that Ashton, despite loving Demi, would be attracted to women closer to his age. Ashton may also be feeling constrained by the Kabbalah faith that Demi initiated him into upon their marriage, especially since their divorce was discouraged by their Rabbi, who feels that the divorce is not a function of their feelings, but more of an event that will “reflect badly on Kabbalah.” As onlookers, it is impossible to tell, but it’s not uncommon for marriages to fall apart because the marriage was really between three people instead of the intended two. None of this is fact, but it’s fair to guess that Ashton was not merely being heartless during his sexual encounter with Sara Leal.

Without having all the inside details on Demi and Ashton’s marriage, it’s impossible to judge Ashton’s cheating ways as the sole cause for the collapse of his marriage. The cheating party typically gets the short end of the stick when it comes to such a scandal, and the public rarely questions what caused them to cheat in the first place. Oversimplifying the issue of cheating and the breakdown of marriages, in Hollywood or regular society, only results in more stereotyping and prejudice in the world. It takes two to create a marriage, and it takes two to break one as well. Cheating is not an appropriate response to the failure of a marriage, but the cheating party is certainly never the sole reason for the collapse of the marriage.

In this case, the only two people who really know what’s going on are Ashton and Demi – and apparently Rabbi Berg. As ”there have been problems for a very long time in the marriage” that the public is clearly not aware of, it’s impossible for the public to fairly comment on the issue. For now, it seems that things are still in a speculative state, although Demi does seem to have her heart set on an official separation. However, instead of perpetuating more ignorance and prejudice by judging Ashton and Demi mercilessly for their mistakes, let’s just hope that a few unfortunate and very human decisions don’t end a once-loving marriage. Let’s also hope that Ashton isn’t trying to follow in the iconic footsteps of his “Two and a Half Men” predecessor.

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