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April 11, 2013  | by: Jara Montez
Flickr (Siebbi)

Flickr (Siebbi)


There are quite a few things we are all worrying about these days. Will Taylor Swift ever go away? Will anyone ever tell Rick Ross that he really isn’t a rapper? And did Bieber cut his hair, again? Or was it just a no gel day? So many stressful situations we are faced with, there must be some sort of outlet for relief.

May I present you with the greatest form of relief, Matt Damon in the new trailer for Elysium.

I wanted to add a few more describing words for him, like HOT, BEFFED UP, TATTOOED, GLISTENING SWEAT ALL OVER HIS PERFECTLY SHAPED BALD HEAD, but I didn’t want to appear too eager.

From the same director of District 9, Neill Blomkamp, we’re presented with a modern day Robin Hood that focuses on the all too common story of the contrast between the extremes of the socioeconomic scale. Elysium represents the ideal world. Think, Taylor Swift living on a planet infested with young men. BLISS! Then there’s Earth, where Damon’s character lives, which is where the not-so-happy things happen, like overpopulation, disease, derelict buildings, probably no Dunkin’ Donuts… Blomkamp provides an obviously more cohesive explanation

If you went to a third-world country now, that’s what all of Earth is like [in this movie], So it’s like the bad parts of [any] country; the bad parts of Cuba, the bad parts of Haiti, the bad parts of South Africa. It’s like all of the wealth got pulled out — all of the structure and the first-world elements imploded because they were pulled off onto a space station, so you’re left with a lot of people [who] are slightly desperate and things don’t really work.

Twitter (STCommunities)

Twitter (STCommunities)

Damon, upon hearing some rather upsetting news, decides to pull a YOLO, and enter Elysium to save himself, and of course, the rest of earth! What a hero. What a hero.

For those not into Sci-Fi, and are only planning to watch the movie just because we are crushing on the protagonist (like every Channing Tatum movie, let’s be real), here are two more reasons to see Elysium:

For one, I haven’t really gotten over the fact that Damon never returned to the Bourne Series, (sorry, Jeremy), and instead decided to partake in roles for films like We Bought A Zoo. Eye Roll. So yes! Damon is back to being the ultimate action man. And like I stated before, this bad boy hair cut in addition to the tattoos is so scandalous, but so right.

But more importantly, it’s more than his looks, because after all, he is middle aged, which is slightly odd to be obsessing over, but no matter. This is a social commentary film. With that, directors run the risk of viewers not completely comprehending the intent. I would hope that the audience isn’t turning his or her cheek to the current state of the have and have-nots, but sometimes we need Hollywood to push us in the right direction.

Elysium hits theaters August 9th. Will you be tuning in?

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