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May 11, 2013  | by: Jara Montez
Instagram

Instagram

 

For the eleven of you that still watch “American Idol”, I’m sure you were pleased to divert from the collection of singers that get their hopes up in being the next Kelly Clarkson, but  in reality will most likely end up like Amanda Bynes. Ouch.

So, many thanks to, Mariah Carey for debuting her super hot new single “#Beautiful” (yup, that hashtag is supposed to be there), featuring Miguel. The public was introduced to the song early this week, and now the video, which premiered Thursday night. Considering it takes artists months to produce visuals for songs, I am seriously all about her pace of production.

Without further ado, here’s the review (and unintentional rhyme):

#Hashtag #Hashtag #Hashtag

As stated above, the title of the song is indeed “#Beautiful”. Hashtag and everything. Why did she decide to include the octothorpe (vocab word!)? Well first guess, because there’s about, taking a shot in the dark here, 200,001 songs entitled “Beautiful” so why not slap on a hashtag to be unique? Second would be because she’s a diva, and must do diva things to stand out. Third would be because it’s an attempt at being cool. Cuz all the cool kids are using #hashtags everywhere these days. Alas, none of those educated guesses are correct.

Its for one purpose and one purpose only: Twitter.

Remember the secret to success laid out for artists in Twitter’s new venture, #music? If the song starts trending, it not only becomes #1 on the Popular page, everyone on Twitter becomes familiar with the song, it becomes even more popular on the radio and TV, yada, yada, yada, aka artist is making $$.

Sneaky, Mariah. Sneaky.

YouTube

YouTube

 

Is this a little awkward?

You know, I didn’t think we could get much more awkward than the “Touch My Body” shenanigans, but we did. In terms of age, Miguel is like five, and Mariah is around 63. Slight exaggeration, but still fairly accurate. He’s 27, and she’s 43. She’s also married with two kids, which comes down to this: MOM WHY ARE YOU SCANTILY DRESSED/ SEDUCING MIGUEL IN A BARN. PUKE.

For the sake of the song I suppose it works, but couldn’t we have thrown in Nick Cannon or something? It just seems that there would be less amount of uncomfortable cringes.

However, oh, however, at the age of 43, her body is B-B-B-BANGIN’.

Miguel is the greatest feature artist

Side note, not even relevant to the video, but as of late, Miguel has been stealing the spotlight. After “Adorn” became the love song anthem of the 2010′s, and snagged a casual “Best R&B Song” award at the Grammys it seemed like everyone wanted to make a hit with him. He lent his voice on J Cole’s “Power Trip”, which became one of the best tracks to be released this year, and now, he’s helping out Mrs. Mariah.

And to think this guy was snubbed at the Grammys just a few years back.

Are we satisfied with the video?

I’d say, unless your name is E.B. White, you’re probably totally let down with the video. The song? TWO THUMBS UP. The video? Two thumbs awkwardly floating in the air, attempting to make a thumbs up gesture, but only out of pity.

Slim pickings in terms of scenes. We were either watching them on a bike, or witnessing some sexy dancing in hay.

It’s a cute video. The in-the-middle-of-Montana vibe is uber random, but it’s still overall, a nice little visual of the song. Not her best, but c’mon, what can honestly measure up to the bathroom fight scene in the “Heartbreaker” video??

Thought so.

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