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March 19, 2013  | by: Jara Montez
(Instagram)

(Instagram)

 

All aboard the train to “The Song That Made The Public Go Cray-Ville”

Population: BEYONCE.

The Queen of the World casually dropped a track on her website Sunday, which caused everyone, as stated above, to go CRAY. “Bow Down” is like the antithesis of every Beyonce song. She went straight up jugular, H-Town STAND UP, you will be thrown off a balcony if you ever come at me.

Let me direct you through the reasons why this is so glorious.

1. The single cover

She took a page right out of “Toddlers and Tiaras” with this one. A little passive aggressive, no? Hilarious, nonetheless. Let me look like a snobbish child in front of all my glimmering gold trophies. Do you have this many as me? Lol no, I didn’t think so. BOW DOWN.

2. The lyrics

The fact that there are about two paragraphs of lyrics, and some kind of odd but totally cool gibberish that serve as bookends to the most interesting three-word combination Beyonce has ever sang; BOW DOWN, B-TCHES.

Whoa, yes. Not a single soul on this planet thought that Beyonce would ever say that B word, but uh, she did. She totally pulled a Two Face and showed us her, dare I say it, ratchet side. Dang, girl!

Here are some more highlights of the song

I told my crew to smack that trick
Smack that trick, smack that trick
Guess what they did, smack that trick

So violent! But I must hear more!

I’m bigger than life, my name in the lights
I’m the number one chick, ain’t need no hype
The capital b means, I’m ‘bout that life
The capital b means, I’m ‘bout that life
Beyonce, no need to tell me you’re about this life. And I now fear for my life I were to ever cross you.
3. Adressing the haterz
Not bringing up any names, but CIARA AND KERI HILSON, HI. You might have missed the one hit wonders of 2004 and 2008 respectively, because you were obviously out doing more important things than being teased by someone’s goodies. Ciara and Hilson have been known to, how can I put this, NEVER STOP TALKING ABOUT BEYONCE. It’s either in an indirect way, like Hilson, most recently inviting us to her pity party to combat all the “hate” she receives from other singers’ fans, blah blah blah. Or it’s rather blunt like Ciara, who thought it would be a great move  to call Beyonce petty. Well checkmate! Beyone just shut you up real quick. And in case you didn’t hear it the first time, she said it again for you about twenty more times. I’m taking a shot in the dark here, but I’m guessing this was also a nod to you guys.

I know when you were little girls
You dreamt of being in my world
Don’t forget it, don’t forget it
Respect that, bow down, b-tches

Silly girls, stick to your lane. Wherever that is at the moment…(nowhere)

I would only hope that we will see more of this Ratch-once side. Or maybe it was just like a one time thing, ya know, to let everyone know that she is not to be messed with. As if we didn’t know this already??

Raise the roof if you’re feeling, “Bow Down”, or are you just ready to bow out every time it’s played?

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